In passing ========== * Lauren Kelley-Chew * Creative writing > The last time I saw my grandmother *Po* alive, > > she wore brown twill slacks, a thin apron, > > perfume of water lily, ginger, jasmine. > Now her face is bloated, rounder than I remember. > > Hair white at the roots, tips still purple > > from her do-it-at-home dye kit. > Tubes removed from her throat; the army of machines > > stands down. My grandfather bent over her body, > > anointing her cheek with tiger balm, > > repeating *yesterday we were shopping*, > > *yesterday we were grocery shopping*. I imagine them > > pushing a cart down an aisle of apples. > Grandfather's fingers trace the deep lines of *Po*'s hands, > > the words come softly through his lips > > *won't be long till I am walking with you.* > I see first *Po'*s bound feet under the sheet: > > crippled since infancy, finally resting. > > Obsolete relics, long abandoned. > How many times I unwrapped layered strips > > of cotton to wash her toes with mild soap, > > soaking them in warm water and chamomile. > Tonight, in the bathtub, I will bend my toes under, > > imitating *Po*'s bandages with a wet washcloth, releasing > > my feet back into the steaming water like freed fish. > Later I will learn how the doctors shocked *Po*'s > > fragile body on the count of one, two, three, > > the way she rose into the air, for a moment suspended > > like flying, > > like falling. > I am too young to know complicated tears. > > Motionless at her side I do only what a grandchild > > does for a grandmother before parting— > > I lean down to her cooling forehead > > and kiss it. ## Footnotes * Competing interests None. * Provenance and peer review Not commissioned; internally peer reviewed.