Placing myself as a rejected doctoral student (2010-2022), this paper examines the emergent nature of identity formation across time and space. While presenting a layered account of my lived experience in seeking pathways of pursuing doctoral study, each reading experience leads me to produce my identity(ies) and situated knowledge(s) as an outsider. To illustrate the complexity of one's lived experience, I choose to present my work in an unconventional format of scholarship. By giving voice to an academic outsider, this paper adds to the nascent literature on the non-linear becomingness of academic identity. Further, this form of scholarship advocates for writing "differently" as a means to empower minorities to articulate their diverse epistemology. The implication of writing up this public letter helps me mitigate feelings of vulnerability and rebuild self-confidence, creating a space of being and its potential to reconstitute the self in their becomingness.