Using affect theory, I explore how a performer's guiding skills for interactive performing arts improve when the performer takes into account both their own discomfort and that of the audience. I propose an analysis of the work of Myriam Lefkowitz (FR) and Sarah John (AU/DK) using the concept of 'responsible combodying'. This non-dyad approach, which incorporates the qualities of listening and articulating propositions, supports the view that discomfort provides a performer the opportunity to learn and readjust their chosen line of action.