We are all part of different communities of practice (Wenger, 1998) that impact who it is possible for us to be and become. Through the process of self-study described in this paper, we seek to understand our personal experiences within a particular teacher education program, but also offer insight into the social and political complexities of institutional change at the program level. This study describes a sense-making process of a time fraught with disengagement and illness, and our efforts at finding ways to lead connected, healthy lives in the academy. Through an analysis of program meeting meetings and other documentation, we discuss how we came to understand program operations and our role in them.